I found myself on the street. Late night, street lights on, low traffic.
Tonight was a great night to go out on a date. Not too many people were walking the streets of Old Montreal that night. We could enjoy the cobblestone streets without having to worry about bumping too many people. I had an issue with the crowds.
But this night, it was good that no one was on these streets. I could have gotten into a fight. I was pissed off! And before I could take that deep breath, there she went, coming after me...
"Hakeem! Why did you leave?"
"Chels! Get the fuck back in there!"
"Not until you tell me why you left!"
"I left because of you! You're pissin me off!"
"Why? Cause I'm asking questions?"
"Asking questions that were already answered! Why do you need to reash bullshit? Especially when we could be enjoying tonight!"
She stood in front of me and placed her hands in front of her. Almost as if it was a way to simmer down the emotions that she had boiling inside of her. She said, "I need security and that's why I ask my questions."
"So me making sure that you have to worry about nothing is not security enough? Me taking care of your every need is not security?"
"Maybe I need more. I'd like to see you more!"
"You know how my life is! I..."
I had to stop! I paced around the space where we were. I could myself breathe out loud. I could see my chest rising with each inhale. I had to leave. This was not working out. I could not be going through the same argument over and over again, giving out the same answers all the time. I needed to...
My train of thought stopped. She grabbed my hand and it stopped me dead in my tracks. The arguments were annoying, but damn if I didn't enjoy the person she was. Her softness always held me down. Using that softness as a weapon to get me to calm down and make her point.
I rested against the lamp post. She came close to me and then rested her head on my chest. Makeup on my shirt... Again.
In her softest voice, she said to me, "I don't know what I would do if you were no longer in my life."
My voice softened as well. My energy matched hers.
"Why do you keep trying to make me crazy?"
I heard her sniffling. Water works. She was crying. Dirtying my shirt some more. She wiped her tears and said, "I just feel like we need to work on us a little more before we can get better."
A huge sigh came out of me. I didn't know how else to respond. Actually... I knew how to respond.
I leaned towards her and kissed the top of her head.
She was satisfied... until the next time she felt like getting a reaction out of me. Draining me of my energy. Almost as if she enjoyed it. But I couldn't get enough of her crazy ass.
And then I looked at my shirt defeated. How was I going to explain this to the other one?